loudl.una (loudluna) wrote in deardrarry,

Writer's Block

Hi Guys!
This is my first ever entry, Draco and Harry tackling the dreaded Writer's Block. :)

Dear Drarry,

I’m stumped! I’ve been writing fanfiction for years but now I’ve been hit by a dragon-sized case of writer’s block. Help me out of this!


I.R. Good

“Dear I.R., I’m honestly not surprised to find out that your so-called “writing prowess” has dried out, seeing as your own name breaches grammatical boundaries by itself. Really, ‘I.R. Good’? I suggest you put yourself up for adoption post-haste. Surely there are a few dog shelters near your current residence, why don’t you—”

“Draco, what’d I tell you about calling our audience as pets?”

“I was not referring to her as a pet. I was referring to her as a stray, rabid dog. She certainly sounds like one, barking and nagging, I’ve got half a mind to stick a bone up her—”

“Draco! This is an advice column. People ask us for a reason, you know. Why’re you so touchy all of a sudden?”

“Touchy? I’m not touchy Potter. I’m merely aggravated at the daft choice of a first question. And why are you so protective of her? Fancy little Miss ‘I.R. Good’ eh? Well then—”

“…Do you have to do this now, Draco?”

“—if she’s ‘I.R. Good’, I can honestly say that I’m ‘I.R. Better’! Best, even! As a matter of fact, Miss Good, you should use that little piece of information to cure your problem.

It’s the ultimate solution to your tendency to produce prose which gouges eyes and traumatizes minds. Write about the supreme light whose radiance seizes the hearts and minds of men and women alike, the sole messenger of sheer bliss and gratification to all who glance at his dazzling façade, the source of all beauty, with an appearance so blinding that you—”

“Mother of God, you’re rambling on about yourself again!”

“Well I don’t see anything wrong about that. It would certainly alleviate her lack of inspiration, will it not? After all, beauty reaches all corners of the body.”

“Fine, I give up! Anyway, I do agree that you’re beautiful. Now, Miss Good, I suggest you take a breather. Do something else for a while that could take your mind completely off writing. You could play a round of chess or take a few photos to gather inspiration from. Just do anything and everything that’ll make you forget about writing. It’s a great way to relax your thoughts and give you fresh ideas to start from. You could also read up on other authors so you could get a few tips or two. Whenever I’m short a few inches with my Potions essays, I ask for help from Hermione. cough Okay, I copy from Hermione but please don’t do that; I just want to tell you about the value of asking for a hand now and then. You shouldn’t go and plagiarize what others worked hard on. Ron, here’s to hoping you’re listening to this. Now, these are some of my tips on how to overcome writer’s block… Um, Draco? You okay? You haven’t interrupted me for 3 minutes, something’s wrong.”

“…You really think I’m beautiful?”

“Of course, I do. You’re my Draco. You always will be.”

“Well then… I forgive you for earlier, Harry.”

“Draco, I didn’t do anything.”

“Oh shut up, I’m forgiving you and all already! Don’t expect anything more, Harry James—”

“Moving on, I hope that we helped resolve your problem and that you get to writing as usual now. If any of you out there would like to ask us a question, don’t hesitate to owl us. If you’re a muggle, you could send it through the internet. We always—”

“Ugh. Do remind me why we’re allowing muggles to write us.”

“Draco, muggles are great people, trust me. Millions of our fans are. I thought you’d love all the extra adoration and worshipping.”

“…Fine. But I’m still not touching their post with my bare hands.”

“You do need to work on your public relations Draco. I seriously recommend that. Anyway, again, please send us some letters! Anything would do.”

“Do have the intelligence to use a pen name if your real one is as idiotic as the above, however.”

“…Never mind.”


Comments please :)
Tags: draco malfoy, drarry, harry potter, slash
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